Viewpoints - Communication Destruction Or....

Viewpoints! Everyone has them and they are personal. However, when you believe that only your view is correct, you shut out other people and do not listen to the facts they are giving.

Your brain's "Reticular Activating System" will actually filter away anything that is in contradiction to these beliefs. Basically, you close off communication and any connection with the other person. And where there is no communication, there is no mastery of your life.

It is important to understand that our viewpoints are based on our outlook in life.

This outlook has been shaped and molded by:
Our own biases
How we were raised in what culture, religion and society
How we were educated, to what level and in what area
Our occupation
Our life experience- that which has happened in our lives
Our expectations of others and ourselves
Our relationships with others and ourselves

There is more than one viewpoint and many situations have multiple viewpoints. If we can back away from ours and look at someone else's side, we are then able to have a greater understanding of the others person's point of view. Only then can true understanding and communication may proceed. This does not mean agreeing with the other person. It means trying to understand theirs.

For some people there is a fear to looking at others viewpoints. I have heard people say, what if I am wrong and what if everything that I have believed is wrong?

First, just because ours are different, doesn't mean you are wrong. It just means different. This is a lesson that many people in the world still need to understand in order for compassion and wisdom to enter into their lives. Sadly, there are many who would rather live a life of horror and devastation rather that see that there are different ways of doing things.

Ask yourself, if you ever believed that you had to get others to accept your way of seeing things? Even if you had force it on them. And ask, why?

If you believe that only your viewpoint is right, you make everyone else wrong. In the right / wrong game, there is no understanding, no connection, no communication, and ultimately, no achieving what you desire to. People get defensive when they believe that you are making them wrong, just because you see things differently from them.

For example, the words new, expensive and luxury have different meanings for different people. To one person, new may mean getting an outfit at a second hand store. It is new to that person. To another, new would be never worn by anyone. An expensive item to one person may be a $20.00 gift and to another it would be a $1,000.00.

Luxury items to one person my mean, TV, a trip, a computer and to another these items may be considered a necessity. None is right or wrong, they are just different outlooks with different values. Ask yourself, what do I consider luxury and necessity and why?

Often our assumptions form our views and we look for facts that help prove this. We can even start seeing things that are not there, just to prove we are right. When we stop to realize there may be different ways of looking at things and different possible conclusions, we then can take a step back and see from the others viewpoint. We can then connect with them and see life and other people on a completely new level.

Remember from A to C there are many paths of B. Just because you found one does not make it the only way.

Steven Covey stated it succinctly when he said, We simply assume that the way we see things is the way they really are or the way they should be. And our attitudes and behaviors grow out of these assumptions.

I wish you great joy and amazement as you discover this for yourself.

All the Best!
Maria Boomhower
The Master Communicator

To sign up for a free report on "The 7 Secrets to Communication Mastery" go to:
http://www.falconfreedom.com

P.S. If you like what you're reading in this newsletter, you'll love the book,
"Overcoming Barriers to Communication"
It's an interactive manual that takes you through the steps to help you overcome
challenges in communicating and connecting with others.
Overcoming Barriers to Communciation


Making Communication Effective: 4 Language Filters

Language is a challenging way to communicate. It allows us... Read More

Assertive Communication: 20 Helpful Tips

Most of us know that assertiveness will get you further... Read More

The Enchantment of Tribes to Belong To

I am remembering and have a desire to share with... Read More

Do You Really Need A Home Business Mentor?

Having a mentor can mean the difference between success and... Read More

Emotional Dependency or Emotional Responsibility

Emotional dependency means getting one's good feelings from outside oneself.... Read More

Whats Next Syndrome

Terms like Postpartum, Post Traumatic and Post Gulf War are... Read More

You Have The Right

The other day I was having a interesting conversation with... Read More

Tame The Financial Beast

Are holiday bills surprising you? Are you hoping that if... Read More

4 Ways To Avoid Looking Stupid When Making Small Talk

The fear of saying something silly and feeling embarrassed stops... Read More

Is Your Attitude Destroying Your Health?

A positive attitude may bring good health and success. If... Read More

Business Coaching Legacy: Reflections on What You Want to Leave Behind?

Updating my will has been on my mind for quite... Read More

The Role of Grief Group Facilitators

Technically, there are two types of grief groups. Informational and... Read More

Priorities: Are You Living Yours?

In the Charles Dickens classic, "The Christmas Story", Scrooge is... Read More

Taking The Coach Approach

When you use what you go through to grow through,... Read More

More Money & Less Stress?

At 2pm last Wednesday, I got a call from one... Read More

Top 10 Ways to Coach Yourself to Total Success!

Coaching is about being your best. It's about performance, about... Read More

Top Ways to Maximize Your Talents at Work

Are you maximizing your strengths and promoting your talents at... Read More

Moment of Magic

Laughter may or may not be a shock, relieved, but... Read More

Do You Make These Common Mistakes When Talking to People?

Many moons ago. Talking to people was something I avoided... Read More

The Right Coach

Who is the Best Coach For Achieving Your Goals?A friend... Read More

Addiction to Blame

Allen consulted with me because his wife of 18 years... Read More

How to Deal Effectively with Anxiety

Every human feels anxiety on occasion; it is a part... Read More

Being an Emotional Victim

None of us like to think of ourselves as victims.... Read More

How To Increase Your Coaching Record By At Least 25%

"How can I become a better and more effective coach?"... Read More

COACHING: When it?s Beyond Oprah and Dr. Phil

How many more servings of the daytime self-help salad will... Read More