|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Thinking about getting a divorce doesn't necessarily mean that you should try to stop your divorce. Conversely, it could be wise to try to s top your divorce, only you know whether you should. Just because you're thinking about getting a divorce, doesn't necessarily mean that you should try to stop your divorce, although its logical to automatically assume so.
In order to be clear that you really want to stop your divorce if you're thinking about getting a divorce, you should use any or all of the following steps to make that determination:
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 1: Examine why you're thinking about getting a divorce and clearly define and outline those reasons.
This is a vital part of determining whether you really do want to stop your divorce. It is easy to naturally think you should get a divorce if feel empty, confused, alone, frustrated, etc. But do yourself a favor, figure out what actually has you feeling like you do and write it down. Only then will you be able to decide whether you should make a serious effort trying to stop your divorce.
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 2: Determine if guilt is seemingly forcing you to think about wanting to stop your divorce of if there's something inside you that really wants to stop the divorce.
Guilt can play a factor when you're thinking about getting a divorce, don't let it be the determining factor for wanting to stop your divorce. If guilt is the major reason that you want to stop your divorce, sit down and re-think everything. Ask yourself if you'll feel sorry for your spouse because you know how he or she will react to your decision to get a divorce. You will know if guilt is swaying you one way or another.
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 3: Use projection to foresee how how your spouse will react if you try to stop your divorce.
You know whether your spouse will be please or disgruntled if you try to stop your divorce. You have an idea of how he or she will react if you try to patch things up and avoid a divorce. If your spouse will react positively if you try to stop your divorce, you should be happy. You may have a chance to make it work. But, if your spouse will react harshly to efforts to stop your divorce, you should ask yourself why. Figure out what your spouses motivations would be for reacting negatively and determine whether or not its still worth trying to stop your divorce or if you should just develop a plan to part amicably.
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 4: Think about what your life would be like if you tried to stop your divorce and compare that scenario with what your currently going through.
Figure out what you want out of the situation and decide what you want your future to look like. If you feel that your life will worsen by trying to stop your divorce, maybe you should re-think what your planning. If you feel that you'd like to at least try to stop your divorce, even if its for selfish reasons, then take comfort in the fact that you've at least made the decision to act. Also, ask yourself whether or not the life you want is with your spouse, even if everything turned out exactly the way you planned for it and you were able to stop your divorce.
Ask yourself, "Even if I implement this plan and manage to stop my divorce, is this really the person I want to spend my life with?" The answer to this question will help you determine your course of action.
Should You Stop Your Divorce?, step 5: Implement your plan of action to either stop your divorce or plan to get a divorce.
Nothing will change if you don't act. Now that you've decided to work it out or get a divorce, set a plan in motion with your true end goal in mind. If you want to get a divorce, do what you need to in order to get what you need out of the situation...be amicable. You do not want to look back later on and feel like you didn't act in a mature fashion.
If you truly want to stop your divorce, use the right resources to determine the best course of action to do that. Divorce is serious, you should make certain for your sake and for your spouse's sake that you did all you could to stop your divorce...and be happy about it!
© Karl Augustine, 2005
"A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce"
Deciding on Divorce
Let me preface this by saying right up front -... Read More
Collaborative law is based on the realization that the commitment... Read More
Women who believe a divorce is a possibility or who... Read More
Even if you believe your case will ultimately be agreed... Read More
There are many advantages to doing your own divorce. Three... Read More
1. DO allow yourself enough time to make one of... Read More
I thought I would never feel the light of life... Read More
Dating is tough for just about everybody, but it's even... Read More
Divorce is something no one hopes will happen to them... Read More
Let's look at how a divorce case works so you... Read More
Having a marriage problem can be agonizing especially if you're... Read More
Divorce is difficult at the 'best' of times. Even when... Read More
Surviving divorce can be a valid fear if you're contemplating... Read More
Finance in marriage seperation is a very big issue particularly... Read More
No one besides you can determine whether or not a... Read More
As a licensed mental health professional, I work with many... Read More
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few... Read More
For the over 50% of marriages that end in divorce,... Read More
Thinking about getting a divorce doesn't necessarily mean that you... Read More
When you're faced with the possibility of divorce it's important... Read More
Seven Tips to help you keep more of your money... Read More
The best predictor of a good divorce outcome is the... Read More
Stay MarriedAlong with any tough decision comes reluctance, especially when... Read More
It is fitting that I should write this story on... Read More
So, you've decided that you're no longer "a couple", but... Read More
Attempts to use the worldwide Web as an effective means... Read More
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few... Read More
Mary and Bill recently divorced. Their divorce decree stated that... Read More
One out of every two marriages in America is failing.American... Read More
This article and my articles "Overcoming Obstacles to Agreement" and... Read More
It's a well known fact that in this day and... Read More
It is fitting that I should write this story on... Read More
Of course you want to get your Judgment--that's the goal... Read More
Going through a divorce is a very challenging time in... Read More
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few... Read More
Selecting a divorce lawyer to handle your family law case... Read More
No matter which side you are on, spousal support is... Read More
Knowing What To Do In DivorceKnowing what to do when... Read More
Let's look at how a divorce case works so you... Read More
1. Have an Clear Written Fee AgreementMost experienced and effective... Read More
There is no magic solution to getting issues surrounding child... Read More
The best predictor of a good divorce outcome is the... Read More
You want three things in your divorce attorney: expertise in... Read More
Marriage is a very solemn and serious chapter on any... Read More
In a recent article entitled "Some Evidence On How We... Read More
Being marriage means being fully committed to your husband as... Read More
When you're faced with the possibility of divorce it's important... Read More
A married woman becomes a single woman for one of... Read More
The most recent statistics show that about 50% of all... Read More
Thinking about getting a divorce doesn't necessarily mean that you... Read More
Divorce Divorce |